DANCING WITH THE DEVIL

Photos: Andreea Fagetan

There once was a girl with long green hair. She liked to travel, sometimes by foot, and sometimes with her heart and mind. In her journeys, she connected to her inner world and wise beings who shared their knowledge with her; this helped her to discover herself. This story is about one of those journeys.

She loved music. Sound and rhythm had a magic effect on her; she felt the music with every cell in her body. The girl would dance at times when nobody was watching, and in those moments, she felt connected to something bigger than herself.

There was a gentle mist in the air that day, and the sun was hiding behind the clouds. The girl was walking along a river lost in her thoughts; a heavy feeling surrounded her. Suddenly she heard music in the distance; someone was playing the violin. Mesmerised by the sound, she started walking towards the music as if something was pulling her there.

A woman was playing the violin. She was young, had long white hair and hazel eyes; her beauty was angelic. When she saw the girl, she gave her a big smile but didn’t stop playing. The girl stopped to listen, spellbound by the music. There was something quite familiar about that woman and the song she was playing.

“Would you like to dance?” said a soft voice, that pulled her out of the music spell. She turned her head to the left and saw a man standing next to her. He was young, had wavy dark hair and blue eyes that pierced her soul. His beauty was as angelic as the woman playing the violin, but there was also a certain allure about him. The girl wanted to say no at first, but she realised that his voice soothed her. There was something quite familiar about him as well, so she said yes.

“Do I know you? You seem so familiar”, said the girl.

“Yes, you know me very well by now”, said the man smiling.

He took her hand and gently pulled her towards him. They started dancing quite close, their bodies moving in the same rhythm effortlessly. Suddenly, the girl felt a chill through her body and at that moment, she realised who he was.

“I know who you are now,” said the girl calmly.

“You are not afraid of me anymore, you changed a lot,” he said.

“I know that you don’t want to hurt me,” said the girl and leaned her head on his shoulder, while continuing to dance.

“I never wanted to hurt you. I’m not here to destroy you, I’m here to make you stronger. I never made you do anything that you didn’t want to, you were just not strong enough to say no. I’m part of you, and you needed me to grow” he said softly.

“I know that now. I’m learning to accept you, but it’s not easy sometimes” said the girl.

“I know it’s not, but I am what makes you human,” he said. “Humans crave light because their soul, their essence is perfect and pure. What if I told you that humans are fallen Angels having a human experience? Fallen not because they did something wrong, but because they wanted to experience what it was like to be human, with all its darkness. It’s the awareness and acceptance of this darkness that helps people grow and become better human beings. After all, there is no light without dark; they are just two sides of the same coin.”

Painting: Andreea Fagetan, July 2019

 “Yin and yang…” whispered the girl.

“Exactly” he said. “The thing is that humans find it hard to accept the fact that they have a dark side; so they reject it and place it onto something or someone outside of them because it makes them feel better,” he continued.

“Something or someone outside… you mean like you?” asked the girl smiling.

“Yes, like me,” he said. “But also, other people who are more connected to this dark side because of their painful life experiences. For humans it’s too much to accept that they are not only good, they also have the power to kill, lie, hate, cheat, manipulate, judge and destroy. Both sides are deep inside of them because it’s part of who they are. It’s their own choice if they want to use their dark side, nobody else’s; but to accept this it would mean that they are evil too, and that is not aligned with their true essence. It would also mean that they would have to accept responsibility for their actions,” he continued.

“True, I hated the idea of being bad. I wanted to be perfect like an Angel” said the girl.

“But you are like an Angel, it’s just that you are also like a Devil at the same time” he replied laughing softly.

The girl looked into his eyes and smiled. “I know that now. Thank you for helping me become stronger” she whispered.

Painting: Andreea Fagetan, July 2019

He smiled back at her and kissed her softly on her forehead. You are stronger than you think you are. Remember that nobody can put you down unless you let them” he said. The music stopped at that moment, and he gently let go of her waist.

“We have to go now, but I’ll be here if you need me,” he said.

“We?” asked the girl, confused.

He turned his head to the angelic woman playing the violin; she smiled back at him, nodded, and looked up towards the sky.

The girl with the green hair looked up too; the sun was out now and shining brightly. She closed her eyes and let the sun gently caress her face. When she lowered and opened her eyes, they were both gone.

As the girl stood there thinking about his words, two long feathers, one white and one black, glided through the air and landed at her feet; she picked them up and smiled. She knew there was still a lot to learn about being human, but now she felt more ready to embrace her darkness, not just her light.

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